Now Playing Tracks

Twat Punch

So last night, I took my larazapam because I was having a hard time sleeping the last couple of nights.  And this dream I had was so out there, I have to share since two of my boys are in it.  

So I have these pretty awesome pals named Frank and Brian.  They’re a couple.  In my dream they were fighting a lot because Brian wouldn’t put out because he thought it affected his creative process.  He had started doing all this photography doing random things.  So Frank went elsewhere.  Brian was so sad that he lit his bed on fire, except it only burned the two legs at the bottom of the bed that made it crash down into a slide-like angle and Brian slid out of the bed.

Brian had some creative block and found comfort in a friendship with a lesbian he had met at his new job.  Frank thought Brian was cheating on him with a girl and broke up with him.  Then he started some campaign to have straight womens’ vaginas sown up so we could steal any more men.  Calling all of us whores and would punch women in the twat if he saw them.

I called and left several messages on Brian’s machine telling him I loved him a ton, but I couldn’t have Frank making horrible remarks about straight women and I had to do what I had to do. 

Cut to I am at Frank’s house.  I was safe from the twat punching because we are pals.  So we were talking and I am getting him drunk and proceed to have sex with him on his couch.  After all was said and done, I said, “See, girls aren’t so bad.”  And Frank was like, “Yeah, but I miss Brian.”  Then I woke up.  

This is not the first sex-type dream I have had about a podcaster or listener.  And I don’t get off on it, I am more…amused.  

9 notes

  1. portcitywriter said: Your mind *facinates* me!!
  2. beefranck said: I AM ON THAT TOO!
  3. hellonessapodcast posted this
To Tumblr, Love Pixel Union